Audrey's adventures in Wisconsin (an excuse to post pictures of Audrey in Wisconsin)

So, I spent the second weekend in January in Wisconsin.  It was a nice trip with friends after a rough Christmas break.  The roughness of the break was elevated because I let my thoughts of how I am doing in the present push out some of my time that I think about Audrey.  Its hard to explain to other parents.  Maybe I was and am a bad parent before, but I could go minutes and hours without thinking about my kids (for example while getting caught up at work).  I don't go an hour without think about my baby, but these past few weeks, I have definitely let my current situation dictate my time differently.  I think about this a lot.  Last year, I had a colleague who came up to me and told me that I looked stressed out about something at work.  I felt especially bad, because this was the first time I remember getting stressed out about something that wasn't relating to the loss of Audrey.  I know that will happen, but, again, other parents may not understand, I am a child loss parent now.  Audrey's loss has defined me.   I do not intend to change that because the day I stop thinking about Audrey and the affect of the loss on us, I am afraid I will stop thinking about her.  Just as a reminder, we are a family of 4, and will be now and for all future family events.

One of the things that I love about the iphone is how you can search for people and location.  So, when I was in the Dells, I looked for pictures of Audrey in the Dells.  It was disappointing not to see any pictures of Audrey in the Dells.  She came to the Dells a few times.  She came with her mom and my in laws accompanying Amanda for work trips.  Also, we came up during covid for a hike in the dells and then ended picking up candy and the candy store.  I thought of Audrey as we passed that store.  

While I don't have pictures of Audrey in the Dells, I do have 316 pictures of Audrey in Wisconsin.  It sucks that there won't be more.  But it is nice to think about some of those pictures.  Audrey had some ups and downs in Wisconsin.  She also did some things in Wisconsin repeatedly and somethings were a one time thing. She loved friends' birthday parties, playing at the park in Janesville, going to the Stoughton Christmas parade, and going to the Animal Safari in Lake Geneva.

With Amanda no longer working in Wisconsin, we don't cross the border just 20 miles north of us as much as we did just five years ago, but I every time we do, I will think of the good times Audrey had in Wisconsin.

 

The infamous safari pic and playing at the park in Janesville.

Audrey's first picture in Wisconsin was at the Janesville 4H Fair. It was in late July, when Audrey was just a few days short of her 2nd month birthday.    

Her last (many pictures) were not promising like 1 month old Audrey.  They are some pictures of her the day that she passed.  

The horse show at Alliant Energy Center.


Audrey at UW Children's.  
Audrey at Children's Wisconsin.  Lots of up and really down memories there.



Audrey and Hannah at the Janesville reptile show.






Audrey hanging with her boys on our 2022 Lake Superior Wisconsin trip.  She loved that trip.

Lake Superior Wisconsin trip with her girls.











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