2 years

 

Dree-

It's been 2 years and a day since

  • You enjoyed Frosties with Hannah
  • You went to Target with Hannah
  • You played on the playground with Hannah
  • You posed for the last picture I took of you in my phone after you ate a bunch of steak shiskabob
    • August 6, 2023 7:15 PM
  • You hung out and played with your cousins




It's been 2 years since

  • You woke up in my arms
  • You had a bloody nose
  • You asked to "Ea ToTo" (Eat Toast)
  • Came in an woke up Mom and Hannah with cuddles and said "Mornin"
  • You wore your weighted vest to regulate you
  • I dropped you off at ABA
  • I picked you up at ABA
  • Our last car ride together
  • I called you a turd
  • You giggled when you farted
  • You had a seizure in the downstairs bathroom
  • You carted your white step stool upstairs
  • You climbed in our refrigerator
  • You took off all your clothes
  • Our last meal together
Its been two years since August 7th, 2024 and it took me a while to think of some of my last interactions with you.  

Until August 7th became the worst day of my life, it was just another day.  Another day that I probably took for granted, just like I took for granted many of my interactions I had with you.  Many of those things were some of my favorite things about us.  

I do hate that I don't remember everything as much as I did two years ago.  I had to look on my phone and confirm some of these things.

This week has hit me hard, and it is hard for me to relive around this time exactly 2 years ago. 

Woo Dada
Our last selfie- at Doty Park

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

It Doesn’t Get Any Easier (Amanda's)

Image
  When we first lost Audrey, people often said, or we read in grief books, how in child loss it doesn’t get any easier. There was always some variation of:  It’s hard to know what “it doesn’t really ever get any easier” means when you’re first in the throws of it though, and the shock is so intense. I’ve also come to understand that for me, personally, the shock has been profound and longer lasting than for some others. 15 months in, it’s still really hard for me to grasp most days that Audrey is gone, and that it’s permanent. But it truly isn’t any easier than it was in those first weeks. Which is really hard to fathom if you think about it- How can our world still be as rocked and shaken as it was then, how can this still be as painful and sad and traumatic as then?- Yet it still is. The sadness seems only to grow deeper and the fullness of missing all of who Audrey is continues to grow in our lives. Our family wasn’t complete before she came into our lives, and now we a...
Read more

Sisters

Image
For the second straight year, we spent the second weekend of October in Zionsville, Indiana. Yesterday was my mom and dad's 44th wedding anniversary.  They, along with my sister spent the day with Hannah.  Hannah had a great day, she went to the zoo, got Chick-Fil-A, and pretty much had a Yes day with Grandma, Grandpa and Auntie. The reason we went to Zionsville for the second straight October is not just because Hannah loves hanging out with her Aunt Megan, but because of the Our Hearts are Home Conference for Bereaved parents.   Last year, we first attended the conference just two months after Audrey passed.  One year later, the first day of the conference felt much different than one year before.  A lot has changed in one year.  The initial shock that we were sitting in a year ago has subsided and our grief has transitioned.  This year, instead of just participating, Amanda is on the steering committee.  We both have poured sweat and blood...
Read more

Together still, just a little different

Image
 So we made it through Thanksgiving.  After the craziest end to the bears game, dinner went really well.  Mandy did  a great job with the turkey and the sides.  We even got some board and card games in at the end.  To wrap up the end of the night, I posted this: For those that we didn't spend Thanksgiving with, I may have been misleading that Thanksgiving wasn't good.  It went well.  There are lots of details left out. I was thankful for being with family.  I do have a lot to be thankful for: Amanda, Hannah, my family (especially my dad) have been really helpful over the last 2 months. But I meant what I posted: Thanksgiving will never be the same.   We went to bed, woke up, did some black Friday shopping, ate some leftovers, worked out, and then decided to watch Moana 2 as a family.  So Mandy bought tickets to the 4:45 show and we did a few more tasks around the house.  I set up my Christmas village, which by the way, ear...
Read more